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Tuesday, December 2, 2008

A fathers "True" love!!!



A fathers “TRUE” love. I have always heard the term Daddy’s little girl, But I never really understood it until the day my little girl Gwyneth Bella went to heaven. In the late night hours of November 30th Early morning of December 1st. Logan and I called the NICU as we do every night to get an update on Gwyn. We were informed that they needed to do lifesaving measures to her.

Logan and I rushed into the hospital and made it just in time to hold our precious Angel. She was so beautiful. Logan thinks she looked like me because she had my lips. The hardest part of the night was not watching my precious Gwyn leave this earth to be with her brothers, it was watching the true anguish of a man who had been holding together so strong for several weeks. No words can describe a father’s love for his daughter. I know there is a special bond between me and my dad, but I never truly got it until I watched my husband with his little girl. It brought true joy to me watching him with her.

We got 18 wonderful days with our little fighter. She decided for herself that she missed her brothers too much to continue to fight any further. Looking back on it, Logan and I realize we were being extremely selfish to believe that Gwyn would want to be here on earth with us. Gwyn needed to be with her brothers.

These babies were so close if you go back through the old posts you will see references to baby A and B playing together. Well baby A was Raiden, B was Ryker, and Baby C was Gwyn. When we lost Raiden, Gwyn took comfort in her brother’s arms. She laid so close to Ryker the entire time I was in the hospital. The nurses had to track the babies’ heartbeats everyday, they always thought they had the same baby because their hearts beat as one.

I love my children with all of my heart. One day I will understand why we are going through all of this. Right now I take great comfort in knowing I got to truly love my children for their short time on this earth. They touched more people in their short time here than most do in a lifetime.

I am truly blessed to have a wonderful loving and caring husband. Logan has always been there for me. I couldn’t have asked for a better man. We want to thank each and everyone of you who has prayed for our family. Thank you

26 comments:

Kim said...

You are right, your precious babies have touched lives. They have touched mine. I will be thinking of you on Friday. I wish you all the best and I will be keeping tabs on your future.

boltefamily said...

I just sat here reading your WHOLE blog and I have to say that I am SO sorry for your losses. I have lost two children myself and understand at least a bit of the pain you feel. Please know you are not alone in this.

Mer said...

Here from LFCA. I am so incredibly sorry for the losses of your babies. I will absolutely keep them in my thoughts, and you as well. Again, I am so very sorry.

Maurine said...

I have been following your blog since the babies were born and am so sorry for your loss.

Anonymous said...

I have been following this blog for months - waited to see the sexes of the babies, kept your family in my prayer daily, especially after Raiden passed and then when Ryker and Gwyn were born. Words cannot express how truly sorry I am for your losses. I cannot even begin to understand what you must be going through. I will continue to keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. Again, I am so very sorry for your losses.

Kim and Troy said...

Praying for your and your husband as you struggle through this incredibly difficult time. You are wonderful, strong, loving parents. Your angels were blessed to have such an incredible Mommy & Daddy. Your blog has been an inspiration to me and I will continue to lift you up in prayer.

Katie said...

No no no, it's not fair. I was praying for a wonderful update on your little fighter. I sit here in tears, speechless and so very sorry for your loss. Let it bring you comfort that your beautiful little girl has gone home to be with her brothers.

My thoughts will be with you on Friday and every day as you get through this together. There are no words to express my deep sympathies.

Surviving Triplets said...

I sit here bawling b/c I wanted so badly for you all to make it through all this pain & little Gwyn to thrive & become a beautiful girl w/ no complications so I was completely caught off guard when I saw your post. I am so sorry! I will be praying for you all!

Astrid (TC)

Anonymous said...

You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers. Your babies are so beautiful and they will be greatly missed.

Heather said...

I am so so sorry. What a heartbreaking loss.

Kathy said...

I am so sorry that your family has had to face such tremendous losses but thankful that you also had special time with your children and will forever have those memories in your hearts. Many comforting thoughts coming your way...

Julia said...

Cathi and Logan, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful children. May the love you have for them and each other sustain you through the dark times that are ahead of you. It's not a place any parent expects to find themselves, but please know that you are not alone. My thoughts are with you.

Tash said...

I'm so very, very sorry for your loss. My heart and thoughts are with your family.

Amy said...

Here from LFCA, I am so incredibly sorry for the loss of your three precious little ones. Thinking of you always. Wishing you peace along this journey.

itsazooaroundhere said...

I'm here from LFCA to say that I'm so sorry for your losses. What a beautiful post you wrote. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.

Cara said...

Raiden, Ryker and Gwyn - look down on your mommy and daddy as they miss your faces and as they try to say goodbye.

Obviously, distance keeps us from the service but my thoughts will be only on your three angels during that time.

Big hugs and many tears from Southern Vermont

alicia said...

sending prayers and love your way.

Tina said...

I am so sorry for your losses. Your strength is amazing. I pray God heals your hearts. Your little ones have touched lives around the world because of you and your words.

You all continue to be in our prayers.

Norma said...

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. I am extremely sorry for your losses.

Stephanie said...

Cathi and Logan,
I am so very sorry for your losses. I saw your post on TC a few days ago and just could not think of any words. I just wanted you to know that your beautiful children touched so many lives in their short time here. Your story has made me want to hold my children a little tighter and a little longer every time I hug them. My heart is breaking for you and I so badly wish there was some way for me to do something to help. If there is ever anything you need please let me know.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your losses. Wishing you strength.

~ MJ ~ said...

I'm so terribly sorry about everything that has happened. You will forever have 3 beautiful angels looking down on you.
You will continue to be on my mind.
Take care.

Kristin said...

I am so, so sorry. My heart is breaking for you and the loss you must be feeling. Praying for you and your wonderful husband.

Barbara said...

I come here via Heavenly Bridges to say I'm so so very sorry for the losses of your sweet babies.

LORI said...

Al I can say is God is Good and Amazing! I am praying that He envelopes you both, gives you peace and strength as He cuddles your 3 little angles!! I promise to pray daily for you !!

Tina said...

All I can say it that you both are such amazing souls. I was led to your site through the triplet connections and am so deeply touched by your loss and your amazing way of overcoming such a loss. You write in such a way that can't help but touch anyone deeply. You don't know me, yet I feel as though you both have given me such incredible perspective. Your angles have made a difference in so many lives, mine in just a few minutes. You two are amazing people. It's just so, so sad. I wish you peace and hope for more blessing to come. I'm just heartbroken and so sorry you both have to endure such pain. Thank God you both have each other. You're an amazing couple.
Tina