Out of The Spotlight

After over a week of being in the Spotlight, this little superstar has gotten to take off her cool sunglasses and show us her pretty face...One of the nurses put a pink ribbon in her hair that you see on the photograph...

With everything that has happened in the past few months it is so hard to stay positive; but then, we look at this pretty face and can't help but turn to moosh....

Gwyn is so cute, but so fystie...She has to have it her way...She doesn't like a lot of noise, and she refuses to stay in the position that the nurses put her in....

One nurse tried to move her arms to her side, and she responded by waving them in the air, then putting them as far out the sides away from her body as she could...She is so defiant and has such a personality...

There is not much to update, she is still critical, but stable...There are so many things going on that it is difficult for me to even understand, let alone relay to everyone reading...Cathi and I remain positive and I will continue to update as much as possible with new pictures and stories despite the exhaustion of the NICU....

Yeah Gwyn!

A Brother’s Love

On November 22, 2008 Ryker London Long, the youngest of two brothers and one of a set of triplets passed on to a better place…Ryker decided for himself that he was too good for this earth and could do a better job of protecting his little sister Gywn by being with his brother Raiden in heaven…Cathi and I stayed with Ryker for several hours as he slowly left us, wondering again, what God has in store for our family…

Despite massive brain bleeds and damage to several parts of Ryker’s brain, along with multiple issues with his organs, Ryker lasted ten days on this earth…In those ten days Ryker had more influence on more people than some do in an entire lifetime…All of his nurses loved him so much and took amazing care of him…I think they may have had a little crush on him; “That’s my boy; a little ladies man!”

Cathi and I were so fortunate to see many of Ryker’s amazing “firsts.” We got to see Ryker take his first poop, but most of all we were able to be there when our little boy opened his eyes for the first time…He had big beautiful eyes…He was too young still to be able to tell what color they were, but they were gorgeous just the same…

Many people say that it takes time before you can tell who the baby looks like; especially with preemies, and even more so with micro preemies like Ryker; HOWEVER, there was no doubt that Ryker was our son…It was obvious Ryker had Cathi’s toes, cause one of them curved a little just like Cathi’s; Ryker had my cowlick in his hair; we are not sure which nose he has, but it’s a beautiful one….Ryker unmistakably has my chin…There is never any doubt when someone has a pronounced chin like mine, along with my thin little bird lips…As I watched him die, he looked at Cathi and I with those beautiful eyes in a confused but peaceful way and I thought I was looking at myself…

I will not whine to you all about the tremendous pain and suffocating emotion that Cathi and I are enduring at this moment…Instead, I will leave you by saying that with great pain will come great joy and our daughter is still hanging in there…There are no answers to why we are going through this, but I can assure you this too shall pass and we will endure with grace and one day be joyful again….

Thank you all for your concern and prayers

Logan

NICU Disclaimer

The previous post was to thank everyone who has helped care for Cathi and the babies while they were in the womb. Now that Ryker and Gywn are in the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) there are a whole new set of doctors and nurses who are caring for our babies.....

I must warn everyone who follows this blog, that despite the power of positive thinking, love of two deserving parents, and the miracles of modern medicine, Ryker and Gywn remain critically ill in the NICU.....

We have good days and bad days and unfortunately, recently, we have had a string of bad days that has overwhelmingly exhausted the both of us.

If you have failed to hear from us via phone, email, or any other form of communication, we truly apologize but it has taken every bit of strenght that we have to endure the draining and emotional daily visits of the NICU...We know that all of you who follow our story care deeply for Cathi, me, and our babies and it has not gone un-noticed...When Cathi and I recover from this obstacle in our life, we will do our best to individually thank everyone of you...

With great pain will come great joy....eventually.....we hope....Thank you all for you support and love through this most difficult of times...

Logan

Thanks to All

Hello to everyone.....

This is not really an update because Cathi and I are in a difficult situation that is requiring our full attention....I do not want to give false updates, false hopes, or false fears to all of those who are concerned for our babies....

I do; however, want to extend a special thanks to the doctors and nurses who have shared their time, tears, prayers, hopes and fears with Cathi and I as we traversed the most difficult time in our lives...Cathi and I are one of the strongest, most loving, and best communicating couples that could ever exist.....Cathi and I share everything and we are best friends; when one suffers, the other suffers just as much....I truly am impressed and moved by the compassion and love that was portrayed by all of the nurses who cared for my wife...

I did my very best to be with Cathi 24 hours a day when she was in the hospital...I did my best as a husband to be there for her and help her maintain her dignity as a women, wife, and mother...When I could not be there, the nurses that took care of her were the greatest blessing I could ever ask for...At one point during Cathi's hospital stay, I lost my first born son to an early delivery....It was not his time and he was too good for this earth...Dacia, Mandy, Cindy, Kelly, Darcy, Peggy, Cynthia, Nicole, Hailey, Tracy, Heather, and Kamona (I think that is right) were consistently there to assist Cathi and I with the aftermath of this time...Their compassion and warmth really helped Cathi and I make it through this difficult time...All of you were more than Cathi and I could ever expect from anyone and you truly could never know the profound impact that you have had on our life and our experience in the hospital....

As a loving husband and father, you all allowed me to help my wife in the best way possible and never complained when I had a request.....Words cannot express my thanks and gratitude for the professionalism and respect that you gave Cathi and I.....In the last few months, Cathi and I have felt pain that has scarred our souls for the rest of our lives....We have endured wounds that will never heal and have been suffocated by the overwhelming trauma of losing a child....If it had not been for the sincere assistance and compassion of the aforementioned nurses, I am not sure Cathi and I could have endured....We will remember you all for the rest of our days....Thank you, thank you, thank you....

We know that there are many more people to thank that have been instrumental in our care and if we have left anyone out, it is not that we have not thought of you and love you for the care and compassion that you have given us.....As far as doctors go, there were so many that were in and out of our room during treatment, that we could not possibly begin to name them all; Obviously Dr. Ramier, Dr. Prieto, and Dr. Montenegro are our primary caretakers and made this whole experience possible....Through good and bad, you all have given us expert advice and treatment and we could not ask for anything other than that regardless of the outcome....Dr. Burke and Dr. Bradshaw Graham, you guys were awesome and more than supportive...Thank you!

Exclusive Photos Not To Be Seen In The Tabloids

This is a world exclusive opportunity for anyone visiting this site, I again apologize to any parents reading this, because you will surely be jealous of the perfection, which has been created in Bayfront Hospital...Cathi has given birth to the most perfect children on earth and you all get to see some of the first pictures!!!!

I have spent the past few days pushing away media and fighting paparazzi in the hallways...The pictures you see below, which have been posted over the past few days are exclusive photographs of actual angels on earth...Enjoy the photos, they are truly priceless artifacts of our time...

Cathi and Logan's celebrity babies are receiving top treatment in one of the best NICU's in the world...They have been obtaining first class VIP treatment by the most well-trained nurses and doctors that walk this earth...I spoke earlier with one of the doctor's who had just finished conducting rounds on the babies, and she informed me that God himself said these babies are perfect in every way...God refused an exclusive interview, simply saying, "I think my work here says enough!" DON'T FORGET TO SCROLL DOWN...I TEND TO PUT ON TWO OR THREE POSTS AT A TIME!!!

DISCLAIMER:

My egotistical banter about God and his newly created angels is in no way Blasphemy and not intended to offend anyone, it is simply a defense mechanism to maintain ones sanity...ENJOY!

All Smiles!

Despite the tummy tube and breathing tube in her mouth, Gwyn is the most photogenic baby in the world...It was no different during Ultrasounds when she would make poses for the camera and smile...Although she is fighting hard to learn to breathe and fix her collapsed lung, Gwyn keeps a smile on her face...I love to watch her, because she really looks as if she is smiling all of the time and she looks so much like Cathi...

As soon as I think she is resting, I begin to step

away to look at her brother, and she starts fighting for attention...Her little chest will jump and she will take a breathe, then she will start wiggling her little piggy toes and move her hands, so that her daddy will give her more attention...

I apologize to any other parents who are reading this and seeing this little girl, because you surely must be jealous of how gorgeous she is...She just has the most perfect features...AND WHAT A PERSONALITY!!!

VIP Treatment

Everyone likes to see pictures of newborn babies and how precious they are and this instance is no different...I apologize for not having them up sooner, but we have been pulled in several different directions. This picture is a close up of Ryker as his soft blue lights shine on him to prevent a condition called Jaundice.

Ryker went under the blue lights because the brighter white light that Gwyn has did not cover him enough...Both of the lights, though, different, accomplish the same goal...

It has only been a day and a half since their birth, but I can already brag about what great people my little one are becoming...Ryker has been placed on a ventilator that breathes for him and it was initially set at 40 BPM (breathes per minute)...My little man being the overachiever that he is, was at one point breathing at 60 BPM....He likes to "ride the machine" for a little while; then when his strength is up, he breathes on his own with the machine, which is a good sign...I went to see him last night before bed and told him to breathe and he started breathing on his own so fast...It nearly brought me to tears...When he becomes strong enough to breathe on his own, they will take that tube out of his mouth....He looks so comfy in his little bed of sheepskin, which is a soft cotton like substance they put in there to keep him comfy...The blue lights make him look as if he is hanging out in a night club VIP section...

The nurses in the NICU are so amazing and so well trained...Ryker and Gwyn get non-stop VIP treatment...I think some of the girls in there may have a crush on this handsome little fellow...GO RYKER!!!

Happy Birthday Baby Boy

Today, November 12th, 2008 at 1646 hrs, Ryker was born and was a wopping 1 pound 11 ounces...His little sister was born one minute later (see below)...Ryker is doing fairly well considering all things...He is on a breathing machine in the NICU...There are not many words for the hurricane of emotion that is tearing me apart right now....I am truly a broken man being held together by the images of my new children...I have been bouncing back and forth from the NICU to Cathi's room...The babies and Cathi are some what critical in their condition...I choose this picture and the one below because it has my hands in them to show just how small the babies are...They certainly are gifts from God and they are in his hands...I cannot even express the joy I feel meeting them and the fear I feel for the long road ahead...I walk around these places in a paradox of fulfillment and emptiness...I know our little angel Raiden is watching over them from heaven and pray they will be healthy...I have truly never felt so helpless, worthless, and drained as a person, a husband, and a father...but do not worry for me, I get rest when I can and starbucks has helped keep me fueled...I am excited to be getting my wife back soon and we will continue to hold each other up...Many of you have told me that you like my writing and I apologize if its a little off, I am tired...Please enjoy the photos and keep up the prayers...

Logan

Happy Birthday Baby Girl

Today, November 12th, 2008 at 1647 hrs, Gwyn was born, which was only one minute after her big brother Ryker. I only mention Gwyn because as we all know, "ladies come first."

As you can see in the picture, Gwyn is quite small, 1 pound and 5 ounces small. Her waist is about 16 cm, the smallest it will ever be, so I never want to hear her complain about being fat. Gwyn is a fystie little one...Despite one of her lungs collapsing, she is fighting with all her strength to overcome her prematurity. You can't tell from the picture, but she looks just like Cathi up close. They have tubes in her stomach and down her throat to assist with feeding and breathing....She is on a special breathing machine, that makes her look as if she is vibrating...It is truly scary looking, I thought at first she was having a seizure, but she is okay and they think she will go onto a regular breathing machine within the day...The NICU is an amazing place and I think Gwyn is probably the smallest....Forgive my writing, but it is 0354 in the morning right now and I have had no sleep.

A quick update on Cathi: She is in extreme pain; they gave her a C-section without an epideral and she is feeling all of her surgical wounds...She is also using a special breathing contraption because she is in danger of lung collapse due to a build up of fluids in the lungs...

As scary as all this sounds, we remain positive...Unfortunately Cathi was under when the babies were delivered and she has not yet been able to meet them. We are hopeful of the near future and know that all is in God's hands now...

HI Everyone, This is a picture of Me, Logan, and my parents. We were at one of my baby showers. I have made it to 25 and 1/2 weeks. We are very excited and continue to believe I can hold out until Christmas. My mom wants to write "do not open until Christmas" on my belly. I will tell you I am doing everything I can to make that happen. I am still on complete bed rest and have been this way for a month. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done in my life.....Boot camp, being shipped over seas after 911, divorce, college...nothing has been as hard as this, but at the same time none of those things had such a huge reward. Knowing that everyday I lay here without a "real" shower gives Gwyn and Ryker more of a chance to thrive makes this ALL worth it :) Our 3rd anniversary is next Sunday. It will be a little hard to celebrate it, but I am sure my creative husband has something cute planned. 26 weeks is Friday and that was another huge goal for us, the next goal is Thanksgiving. I just wanted to again thank all of our friends, family, and complete strangers for your thoughts and prayers...they are working. Feel free to email me anytime cathi1@live.com

Pet Therapy

A picture is worth a thousand words....That is about all I can say about this picture...The doctor just came in while I was typing this and told us that Cathi is in a very good category...As far as delayed delivery is concerned, she is in the category where the pregnancies usually go longer than shorter...Again, my wife has defied the odds...To give some perspective on this situation...One of our doctors has done this procedure 6 times in his career and it has only yielded one baby...Cathi will more than double that statistic when our babies are born alive and healthy!!!

Koko was sooooo happy to see her mommy and it truly made Cathi's day....It is amazing how just seeing and touching our beloved pet can change someones entire outlook on the day...Yesterday was very stressful for both of us and we both kind of felt worn out and tired....When koko came around, everything changed and our minds were redirected to a better place...

Please keep all of the prayers coming and we appreciate all of the continued support....

Logan

Happy Halloween!!!

Hello everyone and Happy Halloween!

I am sorry this is a day after Halloween, but yesterday was very busy for Cathi and I...We finally reached our first of many short term goals of 24 weeks...We are not out of the woods yet for the safety of our children but we are well on our way...Cathi has been doing amazing and continues to maintain a very positive outlook...The little men in the picture are decorations at the nurses station...Poor Cathi did not get to see them first hand because all she sees all day is the ceiling, so I took a picture and showed them to her...

The next post will be very cute, Our doctor put on Cathi's orders that she receive "pet therapy."

You can only imagine what that led to....